Sunday, February 5, 2012

The "Dear Series" - Part 1

Some musings about the various array of, er, "colorful personalities" I encounter whilst on the job. I fondly dubbed them the "Dear Series":

Dear ''ghetto, badass art kid', please do not assume all models want to ''hang out'' with you at the end of class. Mrs. Robinson advises you to trade your cheeky behavior and saggy drawers in for some old fashioned manners and a sturdy belt. Take that kiddo and a ''coo coo ka choo'' to you!!!!

Dear ''self involved, moronic artist'' - no it is NOT ok to let your cell phone (w/the obnoxious Justin Bieber holiday ring tone) go off incessantly in art class, let alone you answering it at your easel as you noodle away barking orders to your cable guy for 5 min at the top of your voice (much to the chagrin and annoyance of the rest of the 10 people trying to create in the zone) only to finish with ''I'm in art class now I have to call you back!''. And no you CANNOT take my pix w/o asking or paying me!!!

Dear ''crochety, of mature age hobbyist artist''- I know you are newly retired and can devote yourself to your art full time, but I must gently remind you there is no similarity between breakfast sausage and my lower limbs. One belongs on your plate during your morning repast, and the other is attached to the torso I plan on voraciously exiting stage left unless you curb your crabby, frustrated tantrum. Anatomy class is a good solution, otherwise some prozac with a mineral spirit chaser is what I recommend.

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